No Longer a Seminarian of the Archdiocese of Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia.

Hi friends,

I am back to the 'net world' after a long time. Really miss it.

Many have heard about me - some truths and some gossips.

And here it is:- The Archbishop has given me a letter stating that I am no longer a seminarian of the Archdiocese of Kuala Lumpur. This decision is a result of me defending my fellow seminarian and questioning the credibility of a system of the seminary i.e. the assessment of the seminarians by a lay worker of the seminary.

Please do pray for me, for God's will be done in my life. It is a difficult time, but who else can i turn to other than Him who created me. For the past 7 years in the seminary the Lord has taken care of me, i know He has not abandoned me. He will continue to guard and guide me for the Lord is my Shepherd; "Even when I walk through a dark valley, I fear no harm for you are at my side; your rod and staff give me courage." (Ps.23:4) And what is the rod and staff that gives me courage? It is Christ who manifest Himself through the Sacraments, the many incidences and people i have met when all these 'happenings' happened to me. The guidance, the words of assurance and encouragement is the rod and staff.

Since i am back on the 'net world', i will still write my reflections, thoughts, etc. I will also publish introductions to lauds and vespers including those i have prepared long ago, especially for the feast days a few weeks ago (will publish it according to the actual dates).

Solemnity of Sts. Peter & Paul, Apostles.

June 29.

"No. Not me! God doesn't choose people like me. He doesn't want people like me!
Very often we hear people especially young people say this when we ask them about choosing priestly or religious life. I myself used to say this until I discovered that God actually chooses people who do not expect to be chosen; people who feel that they are losers, unqualified and not worthy, or maybe even over-qualified!

We can see those elements above in the two great men and Apostles of the church; Saints Peter and Paul, the two pillars, on which the church was founded. Peter a fisherman and if we look closely, he is a man with poor self-esteem. Paul is a persecutor, who thinks that he is 'high & mighty' for what he is doing.

But, when they allow God to use them, we see how they have been used mightily for the building of God's Kingdom. We see changes and growth. I think it really amazes each one of us, when we look back and see where we were before and how God has actually called people like us.

We pray that like Sts. Peter and Paul, we may allow God to use us, for God has a purpose for each one of us.

Memorial of St. Irenaeus, Bishop & Martyr.

June 28.

Today we celebrate the Memoria of St. Irenaeus. Just like his name in Greek which means 'peacemaker', he helped solve many disputes in the church. One which is worth to be mention is, his famous appeal to Pope Victor I, not to excommunicate the Asiatic Bishops for refusing to conform to the Roman practice concerning the Easter date.

Today, we find very few people or associations who are peacemakers. This is because it is not an easy task, and many have the attitude of 'its not my problem', 'it doesn't concern me'. Locally we say it the tidak apa attitude.

We pray that we may be bold enough to be peacemakers. We pray also for those countries and associations who are peacemakers.

Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called children of God. (Mt.5:9)

Solemnity of the Birth of St. John the Baptist (The Lord called me before I was born).

The Lord called me before I was born, while I was in my mother's womb He named me (Is.49:1).

How encouraging it must have been to know that you are were called before you were even born, or to hear from your mother that you leapt for joy in her womb when your mission was announced!

Indeed, John's birth is very unique. Like John each one of us has been called and given a part to play. To each one of us, God says the same words He addressed to John and to all great saints: "You are My servant...in whom I will be glorified" (Is.49:3).

John understood this truth. He came to it by spending much time in prayer in the dessert, through which he began to take on the heart of God. We pray that we may understand and accept God's will for us. "Thy will be done".

As a people called by God for a specific purpose, we pray...

Solemnity of the Birth of St. John the Baptist.

It is interesting to note that there are only 3 birthdays celebrated in the liturgy. The birth of Jesus, His mother Mary and John the Baptist whose birthday we celebrate today.

The name 'John' means 'Yahweh's gracious gift'. The child's name speaks of his origin and vocation: he comes as a gift from God, and his life will be a gift to God's people.

So how about us? Come, let us be a gracious gift too. We have said 'yes', but this is not enough. John died to himself and exalted Jesus. Let us emulate John. It is not going to be easy but let his words be our prayer; "He must increase and I must decrease" (Jn.3:30).

As a people wanting to be Yahweh's precious gift, we pray...

Introduction to Vespers: Saturday, Week 3 (Sunday - Evening Prayer I) based on 1st reading of the Sat, 10th Ord Time - Year II.

Reflection especially for priests, seminarians and those aspiring to be priest.

"Make me a servant" I remember a few years ago, 2 final year seminarians had a tough time choosing a theme for their Diaconate ordination and the greater challenge was when trying to live it out. We used to disturb them by talking and singing the theme. I think this theme (Make me a servant) also challenges each one of us. I admit that it is not easy being a servant.

We are here (in the seminary) aspiring to become Christ's servant and for some through the grace of ordination have already become a servant. (Just for the record and to highlight):- A Priest is a servant! A leader who is called to be a faithful servant of God's people. I remember during my 1st annual retreat as a seminarian, we had a Jesuit priest reminding us seminarians that when we become priests we are to 'steward' and not to 'boss or rule over the people'.

Being a servant we are called to be responsible too and that is another word that comes together with steward; responsible. And this responsibility does not only begin when we are priest but before that. In the 1st reading today (Saturday: 10th Week in Ordinary Time, Year II), the last sentence tells us that Elisha rose, and followed Elijah and became his servant. Before doing that, Elisha cooked the oxen and gave to his men. He knew he was responsible for his men.

So we pray that we may come to realize our responsibilities and like Elisha serve one another, especially those who comes after us. A task which is not easy but possible. We pray for Christ's strength, for he took the form of a servant and served each one of us (Phil.2:6-11). He is the greatest servant of all.
Yes Lord, make us a servant like you.

Introduction to Lauds (Monday) Easter: Week 7.

We have arrived at the last week of the Eastertide. The last 43 days we have been rejoicing and celebrating with lots of Alleluia, more than the usual. We have been listening from the scriptures how Jesus has been walking, eating and communicating with his Apostles after his Paschal Mysteries. Now for us the Paschal Candle reminds us of the resurrection of Jesus and His presence among us.

Next Monday we continue with the Ordinary Time. Just as we have experienced the Resurrection of Jesus, now we are called to get prepared to be His witness in our ordinary life. It is so fitting to end the Eastertide with Pentecost and continue with the ordinary season.

So in these remaining days we pray that the hope and joy of this beautiful season that we have experienced, will remain in our hearts all through the year. For Easter time reminds us that as long as we believe, our Saviour will be here among us still.